My little orphaned inner child

So the first archetype I want to explore is my orphaned inner child. This is an archetype that we all have, just different versions (wounded, eternal, nature, orphan, etc). I want to discover what my kiddo looks like and how she still plays a part in my life today.

When I look at my inner child, I would have to say that I fit into the orphaned and wounded categories. I hate to push myself into fitting a certain type of box ideal, but it does make since to me. Most of us do not leave childhood with out our scars and wounds. We just hope that they aren't oozing all over when we finally transition into adult hood.

We all create our own habits and safe havens when we are younger to avoid any kind of uncomfortable situations. It is how these habits are nurtured or ignored as to the way we learn how to behave and interpret life.

As a child growing up, I was often in the victim state of mind and that was usually tolerated with in my family... that became my status so to speak. I had a lot of struggles with anxiety and accepting life the way it was when I was younger, which consequently demanded a lot of attention from those around me. If I did not recieve the attention and affirmation that I so readily sought, I would feel unimportant and unloved. I would feel abandoned. I was wounded in the overall sense that... 'there is something wrong with me'... or the 'I am not good enough.' This was the constant thinking I was rooted in.

It is easy to pinpoint a definite cause of this orphaned feeling. I moved away from my father at 10 years old and never felt like he wanted a connection between our lives. This caused me to seek the attention from those currently around me to feel that emptiness that he left inside of me.

The shadow side of this archetype allows me to forget that I am now an adult and can no longer give into my childish, selfish needs. Not to say that still embracing your inner child isn't good. Of course, it is. We all need to remember how lightly we used to take life and how we wouldn't put conditions on everything. And how wonderful it feels to give hugs and receive them back or to have someone there to kiss your boo-boo to make it all better. But, with the joys of a childish mind, comes the unhealthy habits of not taking care of ourselves, and wanting more from others than should rightly be given... such as attention in my case.

Because I grew up expecting this attention that would calm me or convince me that I am of importance, I still have a bad habit to search for it, especially around parental figures and of course my own mother and grandparents. I am always looking for someone to tell me what to do, so that I don't have to decide and take the responsibility of a possible bad decision. It takes the blame off of me.

Strengths of this archetype:
enthusiasm of a child
understanding of a need for love
facilitates in the need to learn forgiveness
able to recognize others inner children

Weaknesses of this archetype:
demanding attention where it should not be given
unhealthy ideal of life
indecision
self-concerned